How to Be Gentle When You Feel Annoyed

Do you find it difficult to be gentle when you feel frustrated?  Maybe a certain friend really knows how to push your buttons, or maybe you feel annoyed when a certain family member points out your faults.  Let’s talk about how to be gentle when you feel annoyed and irritated.

How to Be Gentle When You Feel Annoyed

“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1, NIV).

Mom’s Thoughts on How to Be Gentle:

Imagine your family is in the car heading home after a long day.  Everyone is tired—everyone except your little brother who took a two-hour nap late in the day.  All you want to do is stare out the window and zone out in silence.  Unfortunately, your little brother will not stop talking.

“Mom, where does pizza come from?” he asks.

Your mom patiently explains the basic process for making pizza.  You can tell she’s tired too, but she’s keeping her cool.

“But where do tomatoes come from?” he asks after she explains the part about the pizza sauce.  “Do they grow on tomato trees like apples grow on apple trees?”

“No buddy, they grow on vines,” she calmly replies.

“What’s a vine?” he questions.

“Do you ever stop talking?!” you scream.

The words are out of your mouth before you can stop them.  You catch your mom’s gaze in the rearview mirror, and you can tell she’s not pleased.  Before she can correct you, your brother reaches across the backseat and punches you in the arm.  In return, you punch his shoulder almost as hard as you can.

Within seconds, everyone in the car is wailing.  It’s a full-blown meltdown.  Your mom just put the four-way flashers on and has pulled to the side of the road.  This is going to be bad.

~~~

We hope you’ve never lived through a similar version of this situation, but we’re going to be real with you here, so here’s the truth about our family: We’ve lived out a similar version of this scenario within our family.  More than once.

And here’s the clincher: Do you recognize the moment when this situation went off the rails?  It wasn’t the moment when your little brother wouldn’t stop talking.  Instead, it was the moment when you lost your patience and yelled at him.  From that moment forward, everything fell apart.

Today’s verse tells us that a gentle answer turns away wrath.  It’s not easy to be gentle and patient when you feel frustrated, but exchanging impatience for gentleness would impact the majority of conflict within most families.

Bekah’s Thoughts (Girl to Girl):

Do you ever feel annoyed with people? Sometimes, bickering can lead to problems, and these problems lead to more problems. That’s why it’s very important to always be gentle instead of bickering.

Imagine you and your friend wore the same outfit to school on picture day, and you both felt angry with each other.  What would you do if your friend refused to talk to you because she felt angry about your matching outfits?

It’s important to be gentle—no matter what.  Remember to stay calm even when you feel so angry that you want to punch someone (don’t tell me you’ve never felt this way!).  The outcome is always better when we stay calm and respond with gentleness.

And now, back to the picture day fiasco.  In situations like this, laughing about the issue can be the best way to ease the tension.  Sometimes, what we need most is to lighten up and learn to laugh at ourselves!

Talk About It:

• Were you able to relate to the story at the beginning of this devotional? What causes you to lose your cool most often?
• In which relationship is God asking you to learn to be gentler?

Pray Together:

Jesus, thank you for coming to live among us and for showing us how to be gentle in impatient moments.  We ask you to help us become more like you in moments when we feel tempted to argue or bicker with our friends and family members.  Amen.

A Free Devotional for You:

The Girl to Girl 7-Day Devotional offers seven devotions and includes Scripture, commentaries from us, discussion questions, and even a section for journaling.  The post you read today was taken from our 7-day devotional.  This devotional will help you talk about tricky issues, challenge you in your faith, and help you grow closer together as mother and daughter.  Get yours free with promo code GIRL right here!

Find Our New Mother-Daughter Devotional on Amazon Right Here:

Do you want to open the lines of communication with your daughter, connect on deeper levels, laugh together, and grow in your faith together?  Maybe you don’t have a daughter, but you would love to connect with a granddaughter, niece, or younger woman in your life.  Perhaps you would love to support a mother-daughter duo you care about.

If any of this resonates with you, we have a tool to help you.  Twelve-year-old Bekah and I wrote a mother-daughter devotional book together, and it is designed to help moms and daughters connect and grow in faith together.  It’s called Girl to Girl: 60 Mother-Daughter Devotions for a Closer Relationship and Deeper Faith.  It includes 60 devotions with Scripture, commentaries from both of us, conversation starters, and even a journaling section.  We had a blast writing it, and we are so excited to share it with you.  You can buy your paperback or eBook on Amazon right here.  This book also makes a powerful gift for the mothers and daughters you care about!  We encourage you to check it out!