How to Love Yourself: 15 Ways
Nearly ten years ago, I wrote a blog post titled “Go Ahead and Wear Your Fat Pants: How to Love Yourself Just the Way You Are.” It was a post about extending grace to ourselves and being kind to ourselves. Today, we’ll have a similar conversation. We’ll look at how to love yourself, exploring 15 practical ways to be less self-critical and more loving.
How to Love Yourself: 15 Ways
We live in a culture that is steeped in judgment and permeated with criticism.
Learning to love ourselves doesn’t come easily; we need to intentionally swim against the current of the culture surrounding us.
Here are some practical tips for loving yourself just as you are.
How to Love Yourself
1. If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, don’t say it to yourself.
Most of us would never speak to the friends in the ways we speak to ourselves.
If you wouldn’t call your friend stupid, fat, awkward, unlikeable, or ugly, don’t speak these words to yourself.
2. Care for your body like you would care for a precious loved one.
When our kids were young, I fell into the habit of emotional eating.
One night, as I shoved junk food into my mouth, a thought came to me: Would I shove junk food into my kids’ mouths to help them fill their emotional emptiness?
This idea changed the way I cared for myself.
If I wouldn’t treat my kids in a certain way, I refused to treat myself in the same way.
3. Resist comparison.
Comparing ourselves to others is never helpful.
We were each created uniquely, to fulfill a God-given purpose.
Don’t compare your talents, gifts, and blessings with those of others. Comparison is a joy-killer and a thief.
4. Learn to forgive yourself.
We all make mistakes.
Love yourself by learning from your mistakes and also forgiving yourself.
5. Exchange perfectionism for excellence.
Perfectionism leads to the desire to control, which often fuels anxiety.
Rather than trying to be perfect, accept that mistakes are part of the growth process. Aim for excellence instead.
6. Extend grace to yourself.
It’s okay to fail and fall short. Mistakes are part of life.
Learn to laugh and roll with these moments instead of cowering in shame.
7. Allow yourself to have bad moments and bad days.
We all have bad days.
The beauty is that each new day is a clean slate to begin again. You have permission to have a bad day. Begin again tomorrow.
How to Love Yourself: More Ideas
8. Make time for your passions.
Carve out time for the hobbies and pursuits you enjoy.
9. Learn to laugh at imperfections.
Most of us would benefit from learning to take ourselves less seriously.
10. Resist the urge to prove yourself to others.
Living with something to prove is exhausting.
Rather than trying to prove that you are intelligent, powerful, funny, or something else, walk in the freedom of having nothing to prove.
11. Anchor yourself in your unchanging identity.
The truest thing about each person is that we are deeply loved by God.
Everything else is subject to change, but God’s love for his children never changes.
Find your anchor here, and you will be free to love others without needing their love or approval in return.
12. Learn to set boundaries.
We love ourselves by setting boundaries to protect our time and energy as well.
13. Prioritize your physical needs.
Make it a priority to get enough sleep, eat well, stay hydrated, and move your body daily.
14. Spend time with people who build you up.
Some people tear us down. Others build us up. Spend time with people who build you up.
15. Give yourself permission to fail.
Lastly, give yourself permission to fail. Don’t avoid risks out of the fear of failure. Love yourself well by having the courage to step into the unknown and pursue your great ambitions and dreams.
Read here to learn how to love yourself well! #selflove Share on XIf these insights on how to love yourself encouraged you, explore our library of family devotionals and free devotionals below! Be blessed as you walk with the King!
Calling All Parents and Grandparents!
As the parent of two sons and a daughter, I have a heart for helping parents develop deeper relationships with their children and with God. Our kids, ages 7, 12, and 16, share this vision. They have helped me write three family devotionals for parents or older relatives to read with the children and teens they love. I also recently released a teen devotional called Anchored, designed to help teens learn key biblical narratives and apply them to their lives. You can find these books here or read more below. 
Mother-Daughter Devotionals by a Mom and Daughter
Girl to Girl: 60 Mother-Daughter Devotions for a Closer Relationship and Deeper Faith is written for girls ages 7-12. It includes 60 devotions with Scripture, conversation starters, and a shared journaling section for moms and daughters after each devotion. I wrote this book with the help of our daughter, Bekah, when she was eleven. Find this one-of-a-kind shared devotional here.
Heart to Heart: A Mother-Daughter Devotional With 50 Devotions for Teen Girls is for teenage girls ages 13-20. It includes 50 devotions, each with a shared journaling section to help moms and daughters connect through writing. This is a great book for moms who want to communicate about awkward topics—like dating, sexuality, peer pressure, and more—but don’t know where to start. Bekah and I will help you right here.
Devotions for Boys by Boys
God’s Warrior: Devotions for Boys Who Want to Grow in Courage and Strength helps young boys, ages 5-13, learn what it means to trust God and become strong warriors for his kingdom. Now, more than ever, our world needs men who are willing to boldly carry God’s love into the world. I wrote this boys’ devotional book with our two young sons, Aiden and Caleb, ages six and eleven! You’ll enjoy their honesty as we teach boys how to be strong warriors for the Lord. Find this life-changing devotional book here.
These Books Are Free on Kindle Unlimited: God Wants to Heal, Restore, and Refresh You
God wants to work in your life to accomplish what you’ve been unable to do through willpower alone. He also wants to help you establish a rhythm of meeting with him daily as you trust him with the hard parts of your life. Click here to explore two books that will guide you: Be Still and Trust and Lean Into Grace. They are free on the Kindle Unlimited program and for sale in print.
Download Your Free Devotional Here
Set Free: Let God Do What You Cannot explores ten realms in which most of us need God to work in our lives and bring deliverance. We’ll talk about finding freedom from fear, worry, insecurity, bad habits, emotional pain, and more. This short online devotional will bless you as you let God accomplish what you’ve been unable to achieve through willpower. Get your download for free with promo code GRACE or for a donation of 3.99 here. Thank you. This small gift helps keep this ministry running.
I also offer a library of free online devotional eBooks for free. I invite you to explore the collection right here!
