15 Attitudes That Cultivate Biblical Hospitality
Ten years ago, I was just learning what it meant to offer biblical hospitality. My husband and I lived in a little home at least a dozen miles from anything worthy of being called a town. Mostly, we kept company with the deer and coyotes that walked through our front yard on cool autumn nights.
I’d been investing in the life of a younger woman for a few months, and I finally invited her to our modest little home to chat.
As the evening wore on, I wanted to hear more about her life, about the struggles that had shaped her and the truths that defined her. I asked deep questions, and she opened up with answers about her past.
My heart ached as she spoke, and when she finished speaking I did what I thought I was supposed to do as a good Christian mentor. I started sharing passages of Scripture to speak into her broken past.
While my motives were pure and heartfelt, my friend didn’t appreciate them. She looked me straight in the eye and told me she didn’t need a sermon.
I was crushed.
I only wanted to help.
True Biblical Hospitality
That night, I learned that people often want a safe space to be heard. However, they don’t appreciate quick responses that come off more like sermons than loving conversations.
My friend simply needed me to listen to her story. Certainly, there would have been a place to share some heartfelt Scripture later, but she didn’t need five quick and easy Bible verses to erase her past pain.
I later apologized, and we mended the relationship.
I look back with gratitude for what I learned that autumn night: The best way to offer hospitality is to create a space where others know they are safe.
The best way to offer hospitality is to create a space where others know they are safe. Share on XBiblical Hospitality Creates Safe Spaces, Not Perfect Spaces
When it comes to offering biblical hospitality, attitudes speak louder than anything. Let’s explore some attitudes that cultivate a sense of biblical hospitality:
1. Embrace Imperfection
Aim to create a space where people are free to show up and be the truest form of themselves.
Set the example by being the truest form of yourself and displaying the truest form of your actual home. Your goal is not to impress people; it is to welcome them and love them.
2. Express Sincerity
I lead younger women in Bible studies from my living room every Tuesday morning.
I used to believe that I had to know my Bible cover-to-cover and hide my struggles with these younger women.
Over time, I came to realize that some of the best life lessons are learned when I let younger women see my struggles and allow them to help me wrestle through difficult circumstances. We don’t need to have our faith, our theology on suffering, and our lives entirely figured out before we invite people into our homes and ask deep questions.
3. Focus on Conversation and Not Tasks
Whether you’re hosting a dinner party or leading a book club, focus on looking into the eyes of your guests and loving them by listening to them.
Focus on asking probing questions and listening actively. Let the dishes stack on the counter, and let the crumbs pile high on the floor. Embrace every moment of conversation, and save the tidying tasks for later. (Click here for 5 Conversation Prompts)
4. Aim for Comfort and Not a 5-star Presentation
Regardless of the event you are hosting, people want to feel comfortable. They want a place where they feel like they can show up and belong. Offer a comfortable environment and comfort food instead of worrying about a perfect table setting and matching seat covers.
5. Let Your Gifts Shine
If aesthetics are your gift, go ahead and decorate until your heart is content.
Perhaps you love to bake. Go all out.
If landscaping is your passion, create a beautiful space in your backyard.
However, don’t try to force what doesn’t come naturally. If you are too stressed out to enjoy your guests, it will be obvious. Aim for kindness over perfection.
A Free Toolkit for Biblical Hospitality
For numbers 6-15, click here to download your free toolkit: Hospitality without Perfection. The kit includes twenty easy ways to extend hospitality, games, activities, recipes, conversation starters, and more. 
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