How to Put People First and Stop Chasing Performance

I went to the woods because I was tired of chasing the bottom of a never-ending to-do list.  Tired of trying to measure up, improve my craft, and perform.  There was a quiet whisper in my heart, a whisper that nudged me to put people first, and it was time to take a long look at my life and discern what was no longer working.

As I walked toward a cattail-thick swamp, my mind drifted to the words of the well-established literary agent who assessed my writing not long ago.

She told me my craft and my content were good, but I needed to build my platform and expand my audience.

The perfectionist within me quickly got to work.

I promoted, guest-posted, increased my freelance articles, and became ridiculously active on social media.  Maybe a little obsessed.

Walking in the stillness of God’s created world, I was reminded that God’s calling on my life is not a calling to perform. His calling might involve a goal, or in my case, a number; however, the goal, the numbers, and the performance belong to him.  God’s calling is to put people first, above performance. When I make performance my top priority, I miss the highest calling on my life. #encounteringGod Click To Tweet

Struggling to Put People First

This struggle extends far beyond the community of writers.

We see it in the nurse who loses sight of why she went into medicine as she just tries to get through her days.

It’s the teacher whose students fail to pass the state assessments, and she feels defeated.

It’s the business owner who can’t seem to get her head above water.

We find it in the mom who wanted to raise Christ-following world-changers.  Instead, she spends most of her time cleaning messes and breaking up sibling squabbles.

We begin our journeys with idealistic hopes about making much of God. A few years down the road, we are drowning in the ordinariness of routines that are sucking us dry.

I was feeling dry and defeated when God stopped me in my tracks by the swamp.

My mind was suddenly filled with images of the faces of fellow writers.

I saw the faces of other women who are trying to draw others to God through their writing.  For the first time, I seriously considered this thought: It’s time to stop chasing a better performance and, instead, aim to build an authentic community with these women.

It was time to put people first.

What if we all stopped chasing performance and became more intentional about loving the people God puts within our spheres of influence?

Whether this includes coworkers, clients, patients, competitors, friends, neighbors, or our own children, no one is in your life by accident.

I hurried home from the swamp and immediately asked God which women in my sphere of influence I should start regularly praying for.

I didn’t try to pray for every Christian blogger I know. Instead, I picked ten women whose names and faces stood out in my mind.

I wrote their names on a list and put it where I’d see it daily. Every morning, I lifted these women before the throne of God in prayer.

The Shift That Happens When You Put People First

Through this process, something in me shifted. A deep affection for each of these women grew in my heart.

I sent these women personal messages.  I followed them on social media, not so that they might follow me in return, but so that I might bless and encourage them.

We began to build real friendships and point one another to Christ.  This shift transformed my calling in a powerful way.

Regardless of how you spend your days, God has placed specific people within your sphere of influence.  He wants you to love them with his love and help point them to Christ. Here are three simple steps to begin your journey of focusing on people instead of performance:

1. Put People First By Being Intentional About Prayer

Create a list of people within your sphere of influence for whom you feel led to pray. Prayerfully ask for God’s direction.

Divide the list by days of the week, and pray for different categories of people on different days (family, friends, coworkers, church leadership, neighbors, etc.), or use one list and pray daily.

Click here for a free prayer guide, including a beautiful prayer chart to download and print.

2. Put People First as You Encourage From the Overflow of Your Prayers

As you lift these people before God, keep an open heart.

When you sense the nudge to send an encouraging word, act on it.

Take ten seconds and send a text or email.  Check in.  Tell them you’re praying.  Aim to encourage and follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit as you do so.

3. Point Them to Jesus

Regardless of where your friends are on the journey toward Jesus, represent him by loving them well.

Follow his guidance and aim to stay in step with his Spirit as you speak the truth and encourage.

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These three simple steps radically changed my writing pursuits. I pray they will help you put people first as you resist chasing performance in your calling.

A Free Devotional to Help You Put People First:

Do you want to slow down and love the people in front of you?  I have a gift for you today.  My 21-day devotional Unrushed: Slow Your Pace and Embrace the Fully-present Life will help you slow down. You will learn to break up with hurry and be more present to your moments.  Click here, and I’ll send this free resource to your email inbox!

Attention, all moms and daughters!

Lastly, in addition to writing to adults, I am also passionate about ministering to the next generation.

My 12-year-old daughter Bekah and I wrote a mother-daughter devotional book together.  We hope to help moms and daughters connect and grow in faith together.  Girl to Girl: 60 Mother-Daughter Devotions for a Closer Relationship and Deeper Faith includes 60 devotions with Scripture, commentaries from both of us, conversation starters, and even a shared journaling section.

Our vision is for girls ages 7-17 to enjoy it with their moms, grandmas, or older women they look up to.  However, mothers and daughters of all ages are using this book to grow closer together!  This book makes a wonderful gift for a mother or daughter you care about!

You can buy your paperback or eBook on Amazon right here.