How to Have a Closer Relationship With God: 8 Ways
Our world is quieting with the breath of winter now, and the barren maples at the field’s edge speak of what is to come. I want to learn how to have a closer relationship with God, but there are times when the emptiness of winter amplifies the barrenness I feel inside.
How to Have a Closer Relationship With God
Six months ago, a friend asked if the ways I’m seeking God in my quiet time are leading me to life-giving encounters with him.
When I realized my answer was most often no, I sought God’s heart to encounter him in life-giving ways. Today, I’m returning to these ideas as I aim to reconnect with God.
If you want to know how to have a closer relationship with God, I pray these ideas bless you as well.
How to Have a Closer Relationship With God: 8 Ways
1. Learn to rest in God’s presence.
Not long ago, I read a book that challenged me to spend several minutes each morning sitting with God and doing nothing other than resting in the awareness that he enjoys me.
Over time, this practice has become deeply grounding for me.
I don’t force myself to perform in any way or do anything during this time. I rest with God—and nothing else. It doesn’t feel very productive, but not being productive is the whole point.
Most of us face the temptation to find our identities through what we can produce and achieve. Time spent in stillness with God pulls us out of the frenetic pace of our lives and creates space for him to remind us of the anchor of our identities: his unconditional love for us.
2. Draw near to God in worship.
Worship lifts our eyes off of our temporal struggles and helps us focus on God’s power, goodness, faithfulness, and provision. Most of us know how it feels to be “stuck inside our heads,” ruminating over concerns, or letting feelings of defeat debilitate us.
At times, breaking free from these mental blocks feels impossible. When this happens, we desperately need to connect with God by fighting the battle in the spiritual realm—above human reasoning.
Worship is warfare. It pulls us above worldly concerns and fixes our eyes on the greatness of our God. This is where breakthrough happens.
If this resonates with you today, here’s a playlist to get you started.
3. Learn how to have a closer relationship with God by staying connected with other people.
Not long ago, a friend suggested a book called How People Grow by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend (Thank you, friend!). A foundational premise of this book is that we heal and grow through relationships with others.
Seeking God individually is important, but living openly and sharing our hearts with others is essential for growth.
I tend to lean toward independence and introversion, which makes the following reminder from this book especially important for me to remember:
“Many people, however, find themselves cut off from the church and the healing and protective functions it provides. In their isolation—or at least the isolated growth plan they are using—they are easy prey for the gates of hell to overpower them. This is analogous to Jesus’ story about the shepherd and his sheep (Luke 15:3-7). Wolves do not attack an entire herd. They attack the one lamb that has wandered off the path. This is the one who is in danger. As Jesus said, he would leave the ninety-nine to fetch and return the wandering one.”
Throughout the past months, God has healed some deep wounds in my heart, and this has happened exclusively because of the love and care of other people. As I reflect on this, I’m amazed that God has used the care of others to heal, in a very short period of time, wounds that have existed in the darkness of obscurity for decades. There is power in finding this kind of support. So much power.
4. Focus on God first thing each day.
Looking toward God before climbing out of bed every morning also helps me stay connected with him throughout the day. For several years, I repeated Psalm 118:24 every morning immediately after waking up: “This is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.”
I don’t always repeat this verse, but I try to begin my days by greeting God, thanking him for his goodness, or taking a moment to surrender the upcoming day to him.
(Read here for more thoughts on speaking God’s Word first thing every morning.)
5. Memorize the Word.
As I’ve shared in the past, our family memorizes one verse together every week (or two, or three, or four weeks!). We write it on a piece of paper and hang it on the fridge. Every morning, we practice reading and speaking the verse together. This practice renews our minds and shapes our hearts.
Often, I overhear the kids speaking our verses when they face challenging or upsetting circumstances.
God’s Word renews our minds.
Hiding it in my heart helps me keep my thoughts focused on him, provides comfort in difficult moments, and serves as an offensive weapon when the enemy attacks my mind.
6. Learn how to have a closer relationship with God by serving others.
We can also connect with God by asking him to show us the needs surrounding us and stepping up to meet those needs.
Stop to chat with a lonely neighbor, write a note to your child’s teacher, or leave a gift in the mailbox for the mail carrier. Cook your husband’s favorite meal. Pick up trash on the side of the road.
As we serve others, God fills our hearts with his love and joy.
7. Grow closer to God by ending your days with him.
Before falling asleep at night, I often review the day with God. I sort through what went well and what didn’t. I celebrate the victories and grieve the losses.
Most of the time, I fall asleep during this process. I used to feel frustrated about falling asleep while trying to pray; however, a few years ago, an older, wiser friend asked, “Do you get angry when your kids fall asleep in your arms, or does it feel like a gift?”
I used to feel frustrated about falling asleep while trying to pray. A few years ago, a friend asked, “Do you get angry when your kids fall asleep in your arms, or does it feel like a gift?” Share on X8. Spend time in Scripture daily.
In addition to memorizing Scripture, I’ve learned to read slowly and create space to enter into God’s Word.
I often imagine myself immersed in the scenes described in the Bible. Imagining I’m the blind beggar along the road, an onlooker watching Jesus perform a miracle, or a disciple watching Jesus teach helps me to connect with Jesus in a fresh way every time I read in this way.
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Calling all moms and daughters!
Additionally, my teen daughter, Bekah, and I are passionate about helping moms and daughters grow closer while connecting with God. We have written two mother-daughter devotionals together. Girl to Girl: 60 Mother-Daughter Devotions for a Closer Relationship and Deeper Faith is written for girls ages 7-12. It includes 60 devotions with Scripture, conversation starters, and a shared journaling section after each devotion.
Heart to Heart: A Mother-Daughter Devotional With 50 Devotions for Teen Girls is for teenage girls ages 13-20. It includes 50 devotions, each with a shared journaling section to help moms and daughters connect through writing. This is a great book for moms who want to communicate about awkward topics—like dating, purity, peer pressure, and more—but don’t know where to start. We will help you!
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