Purposeful Living

What Does It Mean to Lay Down Your Life for God?

Have you ever wondered what it means to lay down your life for God and others?

Jesus spoke the following words to his disciples: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John 15:13, NIV).

Perhaps you want to know how to live this out.  I invite you to join me in my parents’ living room shortly after the birth of my third child, and we’ll explore what it might look like to lay down your life.

How to Lay Down Your Life

We’re watching the little one stretch his legs in his blue bouncy seat when my grandma says the words that will echo in my mind for months.  As we admire him, I tell myself to cherish these weary days of motherhood because all too soon, I’ll be the great-grandma rocking the tiny one.

“I love you,” I warmly tell Aiden as I rub his legs.

That’s when Grandma speaks the words that will stick with me.

“They need to hear you say that you love them.  That’s so good.  I never heard my mother tell me she loved me,” Grandma says.

I’m surprised.  My great-grandma was a kind and loving woman, and I cannot imagine that she never told her daughter she loved her.

“People weren’t as open back in those days.  They just didn’t say those words very often,” Grandma tells me.  “But I knew she loved me.  I never doubted that.”

It’s a fresh glimpse into my grandma’s life, and I count it a gift.

Some part of me gets it.  Putting ourselves out there isn’t always easy.

I’ve told my children I love them pretty much every day of their entire lives, but I can see that it might be something hard to say for the first time, especially if it hasn’t been modeled.

How my grandma broke the cycle and became the mother who verbally affirmed her love for her children is beyond me, but I know the cycle of not speaking those words ended with her, and for this I am grateful.

How to Lay Down Your Life: 5 Ways

After Grandma speaks those words, I spend days thinking about laying down our lives.

If we truly love Jesus unconditionally, we will be required to live in a way that makes us vulnerable, kind of like a woman who breaks a generational cycle of keeping her true feelings hidden from the ones she loves most.

If we want the most abundant lives, it will require a demonstration of love that stretches us.  It might mean saying, “I love you,” or saying, “I’m sorry.”

There are all sorts of ways to lay down our lives.  Let’s look at some practical ways to lay down our lives for others here today:

1. You lay down your life when you focus on others more than yourself.

Imagine the shift that would take place if you showed up at every awkward social gathering, took your eyes off of your insecurities, and looked for people to love and encourage.

Instead of looking for someone to make you feel loved and included, you look for others to love and encourage.  This is a simple way to lay down your life.

Ask God to help you shift your focus from inward to outward.  This shift can change your life.

2. You lay down your life when you embrace interruptions for the sake of love.

At some point, Jesus will ask you to set aside your plans for the day when the neighbor or friend calls with an emergency.

Every time you help someone else, especially when these moments feel like interruptions, you lay down your life for someone else.

3. You make your relationship with Jesus a priority.

Jesus wants you to make your relationship with him a priority.  He is inviting you to set aside a few quiet moments for prayer throughout your days.

Every time you set aside your needs to seek his face, read his Word, worship him, or talk to him, you lay down your life for his glory.

4. You lay down your life when you put the needs of others above your needs.

We are all called to put the needs of others above our personal needs.  This doesn’t mean that we don’t set boundaries; however, God does call us to consider others and prioritize their needs.

Does your spouse need you to run an errand or complete a chore at home today?  Perhaps your child, a friend, or an elderly loved one needs a great deal from you.  Putting this person’s needs first probably isn’t easy; however, God is giving you an opportunity to lay down your life for love.

5. You respond with gentleness instead of defensiveness or pride.

We all face moments in which we’re tempted to defend ourselves or prove ourselves to others.

The next time your spouse, friend, parent, child, or coworker pushes your buttons, lay down your life by refusing to defend or prove your point.  Instead, respond with gentleness.  You will move in the direct of Christ’s selfless love.

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I’m thankful that my grandma broke the generational cycle and taught my mother how to show her love.  This simple way of laying down her life will make a generational impact on our family.

Where is God calling you to lay down your life for love today?

A Free Gift to Help You Lay Down Your Life:

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Calling all moms and daughters!

Additionally, my teen daughter, Bekah, and I are passionate about helping moms and daughters grow closer while connecting with God.  We have written two mother-daughter devotionals together.  Girl to Girl: 60 Mother-Daughter Devotions for a Closer Relationship and Deeper Faith is written for girls ages 7-12. It includes 60 devotions with Scripture, conversation starters, and a shared journaling section after each devotion.

Heart to Heart: A Mother-Daughter Devotional With 50 Devotions for Teen Girls is for teenage girls ages 13-20.  It includes 50 devotions, each with a shared journaling section to help moms and daughters connect through writing.  This is a great book for moms who want to communicate about awkward topics—like dating, purity, peer pressure, and more—but don’t know where to start.  We will help you!

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I’m passionate about equipping others to encounter God in powerful and life-changing ways. When I’m not writing, you’ll find me hiking, jogging, exploring wild places with my three young children and husband, leading small groups, and mentoring younger women. A certified special education teacher, I am on leave from the classroom for a season of chasing frogs and playing in creeks with my little ones. Most of all, the compassionate love of Jesus has forever ravished my heart, and I'm emphatic about making his love known to the world.