How to Be a Woman of Gentle Strength
Our little boy turned six last week, and his latest request is to spend the first moments of the day lying in his bed as we discuss kindergarten. I’ve been learning to live with a gentle strength that puts the needs of others before my own. For this reason, I set down my coffee and follow him up the stairs.
We lie beneath the dream tent and talk about raising his hand in class, responsibility, and why he should take his coat off when it’s 80 degrees in his classroom.
Important things.
Later, after the school bus has sped up the road, I return to the window and make space for my soul to stretch long with the dawn.
I’ve been thinking about living a more grace-filled life lately, and I know pursuing this kind of life means I carry a gentle strength. Some people might call this kind of strength meekness.
In the beatitudes, Jesus blesses the meek, and later, he describes himself as meek: “Take My yoke upon you, and learn of Me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls” (Matthew 11:29).
Strong’s Concordance adds the following explanation of meekness: Biblical meekness is not weakness but rather refers to exercising God’s strength under His control.
How to Have Gentle Strength
I want to be a woman who exercises God’s strength under his control.
Maybe you’re not the woman who tells her kids to play with their toys and, ten minutes later, barks orders about cleaning up the bins of plastic figurines spread across the floor.
Maybe you never yell at everyone to hurry up and brush their teeth and stop their whining.
Or perhaps you can relate.
If you can relate, these words I’m speaking to myself 15 times a day aren’t just for me, but they’re also for you. Here are a few ways I’m learning to cultivate gentle strength:
1. Slow down.
I know I’m not alone in my struggle to slow down.
Hurry isn’t God’s best for our lives. This rushed spirit has hindered me from living a life of gentle strength more times than I can count, and it never contributes to a gentle spirit. Let’s make up our minds to break up with hurry for good. 
2. Those who are gentle think before they speak.
Slowly, I’m learning not to speak the first words that pop into my mind. I’m learning to look into the eyes of the child with the messy room before I bark orders and talk about consequences. I’m learning about speaking words of life, considering repercussions, and being deliberate about timing.
A woman with gentle strength thinks before she speaks, and when she does speak, she speaks with wisdom and control. #gentleness #strength Click To Tweet3. A woman with gentle strength speaks with self-control.
A few months ago, I decided I was done yelling. An hour later, a little person intentionally disobeyed in a way that touched my most sensitive nerve. I yelled.
Sadly, the yelling didn’t help anything. My child yelled back, and instead of embracing a teachable moment, I escalated a negative moment.
Since that day, I’ve done better. Unless someone is running out in front of traffic, I generally don’t scream. The process of speaking softly is teaching me what strength under control means. It’s also teaching me just how much I need help in my weak moments. I’m leaning into the One whose help shows up powerfully in my weakest moments.
4. A woman with gentle strength lives lightly.
Living lightly is taking ourselves less seriously.
I need this, and perhaps you do, too.
People have told me I’m intense, and I figure that’s not entirely terrible.
However, I do take my values and goals very seriously. This seriousness can be helpful, but when it gets in the way of loving others well, it is no longer healthy or helpful.
Do you need to step into a lighter way of living, taking your plans and goals less seriously? Talk to God about this, and he will direct you into a lighter way of living.
~~~
As I stand to leave the window, a little voice calls to me from upstairs through his monitor. I ascend the stairs slowly, prayerfully, breathing deeply.
I ask for the grace to be the kind of woman who not only breathes deeply but who loves deeply and laughs deeply.
And when the little one with the golden hair pulls my face close to his, this calling to a life of gentle strength starts to feel less like an impossibility and more like the sweetest sort of invitation.
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