Are You the Person You Want to Be in This World?
I drive ten minutes to the North Country Trail for an hour of hiking beneath the naked arms of the hardwoods. My soul finds space to breathe here. As I walk, I consider whether I’m living the life I long to live. It’s one of those days when you start wondering if you’re really being the person you want to be or if you’re just going through the motions in survival mode and hoping no one gets hurt.
Are You the Person You Want to Be?
I was feeling hopeful that summer evening, like summer would never end and cold west winds would never sweep across the bare boards of the deck again.
I’d walked about two miles on the drought-wrung summer earth when I came upon a man and woman changing clothes in the middle of the trail. To their credit, there were very few hikers on the trail that day. And it was hot. Blazing hot. I didn’t blame them for stripping down to the bare essentials.
“Sorry,” the sweet woman apologized, “we were just doing a quick wardrobe change!”
I made a joke about my own history of changing in the woods. We all laughed, and I carried on down the trail without a second thought.
I never expected to see them again.
My hike led me through a stand of white pines, along a lazy stream, and over a few more hills. Turning around on the trail, I decided to take a different route back to my vehicle. I cut through some forested land, hit another trail, and turned my out-and-back hike into a glorious 5-mile loop.
Recognizing the Person You Want to Be in Life
I was less than a quarter-mile from my vehicle when, all of a sudden, there they were. The trail-changers reappeared, clearly mystified as to how they had passed me going the same direction on the same trail twice.
The man pulled out his map and asked to see my route. They were filled with excitement beyond what the simple cut-off probably merited, but their energy was contagious, nonetheless.
“We were just talking about you and your great vibe!” the woman exclaimed. She elaborated, “Most of the people we’ve seen on the trail are wearing earbuds or don’t seem interested in talking. Especially when you caught us changing, we would have expected a less-than-enthusiastic greeting, but you were so kind, and your energy was catching.”
I laughed, thanked them, and took it as a compliment when the man asked what sports I play in college.
“I’m 39,” I said, “college feels like an entire lifetime ago.”
We headed off in opposite directions for the second time of the day, and I got to thinking about the woman’s words. I got to thinking that I want to be the kind of woman who carries a contagious sort of joy and energy everywhere I go. I don’t want to fall into grumpy slumps or lose the battle for joy when I’m in the middle of hard seasons.
That summer evening on the trail, I made a commitment to be the kind of woman I want to be in life: to be kind when I’m tired, joyful when I think of God’s goodness, and intentional about carrying love to all the places in my life.
Create Space to Assess Your Life
We all need spaces where we can step back and assess whether we’re really being who we want to be in the world. Are we carrying the joy and enthusiasm we hope to exude? Do our bad moods and self-centered desires lead us to snap at our kids, grumble at our close friends, and ignore the strangers God places in our paths?
Maybe today is the day to ask yourself if you’re really being the person you want to be in this life.
Shortly after the encounter on the trail, I sat in the backyard while the kids chased our beagle puppy. It had been a day of breaking up fights and barking orders. A day of working with all my might to accomplish my agenda with little regard for the fact that each day is not mine alone. I’d been too self-absorbed to release my plans and remember my kids, to remember it’s their day too.
Watching my kids play, I made a decision. I want to be the joyful version of myself as often as possible. I want to be like the woman I was on the trail. We often give strangers the best versions of ourselves and offer those closest to us mere scraps. I don’t want to live like this.
Laying Down Your Agenda
“Can we walk back the lane to see if the cows are out?” Caleb hearkened from across the yard.
A walk back the lane wasn’t on my agenda. My legs were tired. I hoped to sit in the yard, drink black decaf and unwind.
Isn’t it funny how some of God’s most difficult invitations come on the cusp of our commitments?
Not missing the invitation at hand, I put the coffee mug on the picnic table. I slipped into my shoes, and said, “Sure, buddy. Let’s go see the cows.”
A small beginning.
But I’ve decided to embrace the small beginnings.
A Free Devotional to Help You Consider the Person You Want to Be:
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