How to Find Spiritual Friends Who Will Carry Your Burdens
Sweet friendships refresh the soul and awaken our hearts with joy, for good friends are like the anointing oil that yields the fragrant incense of God’s presence.
Proverbs 27:9, TPT
Sweet Friendships Refresh the Soul
I once owned an inflatable two-person river raft and regularly convinced my adventurous friends to join me as I rafted down the Allegheny River. I enjoyed rafting by myself, but it was more fun floating with a friend. Having someone with me also provided safety for the journey.
At certain points on the river, we had to climb out of the raft to avoid fallen trees and large boulders in the water.
Having someone to hold onto for balance and stability while crossing through the rushing water was also helpful. Slipping, stumbling, and laughing the whole time, it was friendship at its finest. We were adults, but we felt like carefree kids as we clung to each other and navigated the river.
God designed us to support one another by providing support and stability in our everyday lives. We tend to focus on the spiritual practices of prayer and Bible reading when we think of spiritual growth. Meanwhile, spiritual friendship is just as important.
Spiritual Friends: Sweet Friendships Refresh the Soul
This kind of friendship is sometimes called fellowship.
For some of us, the word fellowship has been relegated to potlucks and Sunday afternoon picnics after church. But fellowship is meant to be much more than gatherings around Crock-Pots and Jello salad. God wants us to experience deep, authentic, spiritually centered friendships.
This kind of friendship moves far beyond casual small talk. 
Let’s look at several gifts spiritual friends offer.
1. Spiritual friends carry our burdens with us.
Spiritual friendship includes sharing the things we’d rather not speak out loud and carrying one another’s heaviest burdens.
We all need people with whom we can share our darkest, most shameful, most painful struggles. We need places where we can be honest about our fears, our shame, and our trauma. God never intended for us to navigate life alone.
Hebrews 10:24-25 reads, “And let’s consider how to encourage one another in love and good deeds, not abandoning our own meeting together, as is the habit of some people, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near” (NASB).
Galatians 6:2 reads, “Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.”
Having friends who can carry our burdens with us makes these burdens exponentially lighter. We also find comfort because we are not walking alone.
2. Spiritual friends lift us up when we fall.
Just as holding onto my friend enabled us to safely navigate the river, we need friends to hold onto us as we follow Christ.
We need people who will keep us from slipping.
When a friend starts to fall, if we are close enough, we can reach out and grab her quickly.
My spiritual friends offer me this gift. They stay close.
We communicate regularly, and they are always just a message away.
We can text one another with two simple words, “Please pray!” These words are lifelines in tough moments.
We also regularly confess our sins to one another. We talk about our temptations. We share our struggles as wives, mothers, sisters, and daughters. No topic is off limits. We’ve ugly cried together, and we’ve held each other through life’s toughest losses.
3. Spiritual friends point us to Jesus.
When life is tough, it can be tempting to turn away from Jesus or harden our hearts.
Our spiritual friends challenge us. They help us return to Jesus when we’d rather walk away. They speak words of truth even when those words hurt.
Because they love us, they are willing to endure the discomfort of temporarily hurting our feelings for our greater good.
4. Spiritual friends fight for us.
My spiritual friends go to battle for me. They fight for my marriage by praying for it and challenging me when I embrace a negative attitude.
These friends defend me in the presence of others, but they also fight for me by not allowing me to drift away from God. They call me out when I embrace sin and help me find my way when I feel lost.
Sweet Friendships Refresh the Soul in Even Unexpected Places
God provides these spiritual friends in unexpected places.
They don’t all come from women’s Bible studies or church sanctuaries.
I’ve met some of my closest spiritual friends while teaching and coaching in the public school system.
Some are neighbors, childhood friends, and relatives. Our lives are organically interwoven, and “meeting together” isn’t confined to Sunday morning church services or fellowship hall potlucks.
We share our lives while standing on cross-country courses and sitting on school buses headed to sporting events.
We cry together in classrooms and Walmart parking lots. We grow closer to God because we are together. This is the gift of spiritual friendship. #friendship Share on XAn Invitation to Reflect on Your Spiritual Friendships
Who are your spiritual friends? If you have even one spiritual friend, you are blessed. Send her a message and thank her for her friendship. If you don’t have any spiritual friends, ask God to lead you to another women who can become this kind of friend.
If these reflections on the ways sweet friendships refresh the soul blessed you, I invite you to explore our devotional books and free devotional eBooks below.
Calling All Parents (and Grandparents): Teach Your Kids to Stand Firm in Christ
As the parent of two sons and a daughter, I have a heart for helping parents develop deeper relationships with their children and with God. Our kids, ages 6, 11, and 15, share this vision. They have helped me write three family devotionals for parents or older relatives to read with the children and teens they love. You can find all three books here or read more below.
Attention All Boy Moms (and Dads): Teach Your Boys to be Warriors for God
God’s Warrior: Devotions for Boys Who Want to Grow in Courage and Strength helps young boys, ages 5-13, learn what it means to trust God and become strong warriors for his kingdom. Now, more than ever, our world needs men who are willing to boldly carry God’s love into the world. I wrote this boys’ devotional book with our two young sons, Aiden and Caleb, ages six and eleven! You’ll enjoy their honesty as we teach boys how to be strong warriors for the Lord. Find this life-changing devotional book here.
Mother-Daughter Devotionals by a Mom and Daughter
Girl to Girl: 60 Mother-Daughter Devotions for a Closer Relationship and Deeper Faith is written for girls ages 7-12. It includes 60 devotions with Scripture, conversation starters, and a shared journaling section for moms and daughters after each devotion. I wrote this book with the help of our daughter, Bekah, when she was eleven. Find this one-of-a-kind shared devotional here.
Heart to Heart: A Mother-Daughter Devotional With 50 Devotions for Teen Girls is for teenage girls ages 13-20. It includes 50 devotions, each with a shared journaling section to help moms and daughters connect through writing. This is a great book for moms who want to communicate about awkward topics—like dating, sexuality, peer pressure, and more—but don’t know where to start. Bekah and I will help you right here.
Find Our Family Devotionals Here
Find all three books right here. They are also free on the Kindle Unlimited plan, which you can enjoy with a free three-month trial! These books make great gifts, and you don’t need to be the parent of young children to read them. Share them with your grandchildren, nieces, nephews, or the young ones you love.
Be Still and Trust: Download Your Free eBook Here
Do you long to find space to draw near to God while struggling to make this practice a regular part of your life? The secret is establishing a daily rhythm that makes this time habitual, a routine that becomes as natural as eating, drinking, and sleeping. Be Still and Trust offers daily devotions for those who long for rest and renewal—devotions for peace in our hurried and stress-filled lives.
These short devotions are invitations into God’s rest when facing the daily battles that tend to steal our peace. Download it for free right here. I also offer a library of free online devotional eBooks for free. I invite you to explore the collection right here!
