How to Love Like Jesus When You Feel Annoyed
My little boy comes to me with his shoelaces twisted in knots. I’m soaking in my morning reading and enjoying a hot cup of coffee. I feel like I might be the world’s worst mom, but I don’t really want to set my coffee aside to untangle dirty shoelaces. A fleeting thought crosses my mind—a gentle whisper about how to love like Jesus—and I set the mug on the table.
If I’m being real, I don’t want this interruption to the one part of the day I set aside to center myself.
“Maybe you’re chasing the wrong center,” a quiet thought speaks to my soul.
As I begin the tedious process of untangling the knots, the little boy at my side looks sadly to the floor. His eyes are downcast. He knows he was an interruption, and he doesn’t like how it makes him feel.
When your son shows up at your side needing you, and you sigh or roll your eyes, he knows. He knows you don’t want him there. The sting of your annoyance is really the sting of your rejection, and who in the world wants to be rejected?
How to Love Like Jesus When You’re Irritated
I consider all these thoughts as I detangle the laces. I look at my boy and remember the first time I saw him. He was wailing loudly beneath the white light of the operating room like he needed someone to reassure him everything would be alright. That this wide world is cold and hard, but he’ll never be alone. That he is loved. Cherished. Enjoyed.
As I lay strapped to the operating table that humid August morning, I couldn’t have known that in a few short years, I’d be grumbling about tending to his most basic needs.
And here we are.
I catch myself grumbling, and I remember the promises I made to that helpless baby boy.
I help him slip his little feet into the shoes, kneel before him to tie them in double knots, and look long into sad blue eyes.
He is beautiful.
I pull him close to me. I hug him hard. His arms hang limp as he refuses to return the gesture. He sniffles a bit and nuzzles into my neck, and when I pull back to look into his eyes again, they dance.
Years ago, a wise woman told me to be careful with my eyes. She said the people in our lives know how we feel about them by what happens with our eyes. They know if we’re annoyed by them or if we delight in them by the look in our eyes.
The people in our lives know how we feel about them by what happens with our eyes. #LoveLikeJesus #GodsLove #Love Click To TweetI want my son to know I delight in him. I want him to know he is a gift and not an interruption.
Love Like Jesus by Delighting in Your Loved Ones
Twenty minutes later, I am alone by the window, and the house stills. I breathe.
I ask God to help me love my kids the way they need to be loved.
A thought comes to mind: “They know you love them. They need to know you enjoy them.”
I love my kids, but I don’t always enjoy them.
I’m irritated when they need me for tasks I think they should be able to complete on their own. I respond with harsh words instead of open arms more often than I wish.
Look With Eyes of Love
When they walk into the room, there are times my eyes don’t light up.
We all have bad days. Enjoying our kids isn’t about being perfect or never feeling frustrated. Instead, it’s about creating an atmosphere in which our little ones know we delight in them. It’s about smiling with our eyes as often as we can, setting aside our agendas to unknot little shoelaces, and tying those tiny laces with gentle hands and a warm smile for the thousandth day in a row.
More and more, I’m learning that the quickest way to show my kids I love them is to show them how much I enjoy them.
I’m learning to set everything else aside and listen to their long stories about butterflies and cookies.
I’m grumbling less and smiling more.
I haven’t arrived.
My kids still challenge me every day of my life.
Nonetheless, every difficult moment is another opportunity to exchange my self-centered annoyance for Christ-centered delight.
Your Invitation to Love Like Jesus
Do the people in your life know you appreciate them? Do your closest loved ones know you delight in them?
Spend the next few minutes resting in the awareness that God is in the room with you. Ask him to help you step back and see the bigger picture of your life. Ask him to show you the faces of the people he has called you to love—the people to whom he wants you to minister closely.
Do these people know you delight in them? Do you show your delight, or do you show annoyance when God asks you to serve them? Ask God to show you how you can put the needs of these people ahead of your own needs as you love them well. Your goal today is simple: “Look with eyes of love” when your loved ones walk into the room. They will know how you feel about them by your eyes.
A Free Devotional to Help You Love Like Jesus:
Lastly, I have a gift for you. Would you like to connect with God in ways that breathe fresh life into your weary soul? The Weary Woman’s 20-Day Devotional is my free online devotional to help you connect with God in your worn and weary seasons. You will find 20 daily readings to help you find refreshment in God’s presence. Click here and I’ll send it to your email inbox today!
A Unique Gift for a Mom and Daughter You Care About:
Lastly, in addition to writing to adults, I am also passionate about ministering to the next generation.
My 12-year-old daughter Bekah and I wrote a mother-daughter devotional book together. We hope to help moms and daughters connect and grow in faith together. Girl to Girl: 60 Mother-Daughter Devotions for a Closer Relationship and Deeper Faith includes 60 devotions with Scripture, commentaries from both of us, conversation starters, and even a shared journaling section.
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